Compilation.

The lesson began on May 11, 2010, while reading my Bible and spending time listening to Jesus. The answer came on May 23, 2010, while listening to the Holy Spirit speak through Steve at church. Obviously this is not a sense of "arriving" but an ever-deepening lesson to be learned as Jesus continues to reveal His truth to my heart.
[Sidenote: I definitely encourage prayer journals or even just journaling in general. Without it, I may never have put two and two together, realizing how the Lord raised questions in my heart & mind, then used other sources to answer them. He is amazing!]


11 May 2010.
Matthew 15:30, "Then great multitudes came to Him, having with them the lame, blind, mute, maimed, and many others; and they laid them down at Jesus' feet, and He healed them."




Jesus cannot heal the healthy. He cannot help the strong, He cannot provide for the self-sufficient, He cannot bear the burdens of the individualist. He came to save the sinners, not the righteous. He can only be Everything to the needy, not to those who think they've got it all together.



And here is possibly the only time that inadequacy is beautiful. If I were strong, wise, righteous, & sufficient on my own, what need would I have for Him? Sometimes I so desperately wish that I could just be good or perfect or even just "okay." I wish I could be a nice person and do it all on my own. I try to come to God with my weakness & feeble attempts, and show Him that I've grown up and I don't need Him anymore. But, like a child, I need Him. I need His hand, His mind, His ideas, His attitude, His approval. I need Him to be my "training wheels" for, without them, I would fall, time and again.




I am not a baby; I no longer need the milk of the Word, but the meat of the Word... but I think that, in a sense—while growing & maturing & shaping & molding me—God wants to keep me as a child, having that childlike faith & full dependency on Him.
Without Him I am nothing, I can do nothing, & I have no love. Without Jesus I am inadequate. But, with Him living in me & transforming me, His worth is in me. Thank You, Jesus!!!



23 May 2010. 1 Corinthians 10. Sunday night service. Steve Matheson.


How many Christians do we really see going ALL the way into that place of rest?
v. 7: 'They sat down to drink and they rose up to play.' That can derail you from any hope of living in the Promised Land.


God's people were not satisfied to walk by faith. They wanted something they could see—a god they could put their hands on. The opposite of Christianity is not atheism, its idolatry. Bodies, clothes, homes, automobiles, incomes, bands, sports teams, food, television, pop culture, and people—these are the idols of America! Our culture here has embedded our hearts with a LOT of screwed up ideas, priorities, & idols.


* What do you sacrifice the most for? What do you think about the most? What makes you happiest? What makes you the angriest? What are you the most afraid of losing? How do you describe and define yourself? What do you pray for the most? What do you worry about the most? These things could be your idols... However, these things are not God; they cannot save you.


True, Biblical Christianity is a tough path.


It requires you to take a long, hard look at yourself without a mask, without a façade. God starts to reveal the deep things of our heart when we’re in that place.
We were not created for this world. There is a hunger in our souls for something that is deeper than anything earthly can satisfy.


“Our hearts are restless unless they find their rest in Thee.”
-Augustine